Celebrate Christ Recovery Forum: "The Synergy of Science and Scripture."
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It's not Fair

"The Sex Addict's Struggle
 
When sex addiction clients reach a point of solid recovery, they will either explicitly state or acknowledge something to the effect of, "It's not fair" when describing boundaries they need to keep themselves safe from their addictions compared to the general population."

source: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/minority-report/201605/its-not-fair

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The best way to know if you have a porn problem is to honestly ask yourself why you watch porn?
Do you watch porn for an emotional purpose? Do you watch porn to regain control over circumstances in life that make you feel overwhelmed and helpless?

The core of the Addictive Belief System is that life should be fair, painless and easy.

People watch porn compulsively to change the way they FEEL; to regain control over helplessness.  People watch porn to increase good feelings and decrease bad feelings. We don’t have a disease over which we have no control. We have emotions that we don’t understand and hence don’t know how to control! Life should be without pain and require no effort. (Easy and fair)  The core of addictive thinking is inherent in this belief. If we insist on avoiding emotional pain, on being comfortable all the time, we will have to seek ways to avoid reality, to escape our mood. Porn is watched because they increase good feelings and decrease bad ones.  If you look at it that way, addictive behavior makes perfect sense. Even though it eventually leads to pain in the form of trauma, bad decisions, relationship problems and mental health problems, it began as a quest to feel “more good,” or “less bad.” 

The antidote is to regain control over helpless circumstances with direct, healthy, assertive behavior not a displaced  quick fix or mood changer.  Christ Driven Behavior is direct assertive behavior. 

Christ Driven Behavior is a direct behavior that honors God, a way to regain control over helpless feelings. When we surrender to God, He empowers us with a mentor, that imparts motivation, purpose and the fruits of the Holy Spirit called values. Self-control is one of those fruitful  values!

This is not blind faith or wishful thinking. This is scripture and science. Transform your thinking (Romans 12:2) Delegate or surrender control to a more qualified entity (2 Cor. 12-9), God will reciprocate with a Helper (John 14:16), you will regain control with values including self-control (Gal. 5:22-23).


__________________
"I am a Grateful Believer in Jesus Christ with Free Will and I CHOSE Surrender (Intelligent Delegation) in my victory over, “Recreational Chemical Abuse, my weekend, "False Idols."
"I chose DIRECT health assertive Christ Driven Behavior (CDB) instead of DISPLACED behavior in order to regain control over feeling helpless, powerless, trapped and lacking control. I changed my, "Thinking," and God changed my life."
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There is no reason why anyone with any hurt, habit, or hang up cannot be helped. The Person-God partnership simply needs to be more powerful than any hurt, habit or hangup.

Behind everything you do is a THOUGHT.

Every BEHAVIOR is motivated by a BELIEF.

Every ACTION is prompted by an ATTITUDE.

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With respect to behavior, life is about, emotions, beliefs, thinking and control.

"A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."Proverbs 29:11 (Displaced Behaviors)

"Do not be conformed by this world but instead by the renewing of your mind." Romans 12:2 (Direct Behavior)

When you think and empower yourself and surrender control to God, when you Intelligently Delegate Control to God (2 Corinthians 12:9-10),

God returns that control to you with a, “Helper," the Holy Spirit, (John 14:16) a form of Reciprocal Innervation.

You regain control: "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

No longer are you subject to corrupted displaced thinking but instead are transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2).

This is where science and scripture intertwine, where Christ Driven Behavior brings, values, control, cause, character and purpose driven behavior, the fruits of the spirit Galatians 5:22-23 .

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Proverbs 29:11 "A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."

Romans 12:2: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

2 Corinthians 12-9:“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”

John 14:16: "He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—"

Philippians 2:13: "for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

Galatians 5:22-23 "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Ephesians 4:22-23 "...put away the old person you used to be. Have nothing to do with your old sinful life. It was sinful because of being fooled into following bad desires. Let your minds and hearts be made new."

Life is about finding Purpose. When you have a, "Global Purpose," in life, healthy direct assertive thinking and behavior follow.

Change your thinking, change your life!

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