Celebrate Christ Recovery Forum: "The Synergy of Addiction Science and Scripture."
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I Caught My Husband Looking at Porn. Now What?

There’s another side to the pornography epidemic no one talks about. What does the wife do?


Read more: http://www.faithit.com/i-caught-my-husband-looking-at-porn-now-what-inspirational/


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Addiction, whether it is porn or drugs or whatever habit or hangup, is a symptom of something else that is wrong in our lives.
Addiction is a symptom, the cause is helplessness, the treatment is  to regain control with either Direct healthy behavior or substitute Displaced behavior.

Lance Dodes, MD, psychiatrist: "Addiction is a displaced behavior, a symptom not a disease, caused by feelings of profound, intolerable helplessness and lack of control. Addiction is a behavior intended to reverse a profound, intolerable sense of helplessness. This displacement (addiction) is an attempt to regain some measure of self-control. Addictive actions are the result of an emotional process – an attempted solution to feeling helplessly overwhelmed. This helplessness is always rooted in something deeply important to the individual. The drive in addictive behavior is rage at the helplessness. It is this particular kind of rage that gives addiction its most conspicuous characteristics of intensity and loss of control. Virtually every addictive act is preceded by a feeling of helplessness or powerlessness. Addictive behavior functions to repair this underlying feeling of helplessness. It is able to do this because taking the addictive action (or even deciding to take this action) creates a sense of being empowered, of regaining control—over one’s emotional experience and one’s life. ( Lance Dodes calls it discovering your Themes). If addicts can learn to address their rage at helplessness directly, then it manifests simply as an assertive act. When people act directly, there can be no addiction."

Choose direct health assertive Christ Driven Behavior (CDB) instead of displaced behavior in order to regain control over feeling helpless, powerless, trapped and lacking control. Change your, "Thinking," and let God change your life.

 

1. Don’t let your emotions dictate your behavior: Proverbs 29:11:  "A fool vents their feelings, a wise person holds them back." (Addictive behavior, all hurts, habits and hangups are a (displaced) emotional responses to overwhelming feelings of helplessness, hopeless, frustration, being trapped, powerless and out of control).

2. Change your thinking:  Romans 12:2:  "Don't be conformed to this world but instead be transformed with new thinking." (We can respond to adversity with displaced behavior or direct healthy behavior, which is Christ Driven Behavior based on Christ’s values and tenets…)

3. Surrender or Delegate Control to God (ID): 2 Corinthians 12:9-10:  “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” (Surrender control to God, Intelligently Delegate control to Christ over life’s inevitable feelings of helplessness…..).

4. God returns the control to use through a Helper, the  Holy Spirit (RI) John 14:16:  “I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever— (We regain control of our helpless trapped feelings with the mentorship of the Holy Spirit, this is Reciprocal Innervation-we give God Control-He returns the control with Christ like thinking, values and purpose).

5. We demonstrate self-control the values of the Holy Spirit: Galatians 5:22-23:   “The fruits of the Spirit are self-control, love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and gentleness.” (Regain control of your life in a healthy way. If you have a choice, choose a better life, of healthy direct Christ Driven Behavior).

6. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. —2 Corinthians 5:17


__________________
"I am a Grateful Believer in Jesus Christ with Free Will and I CHOSE Surrender (Intelligent Delegation) in my victory over, “Recreational Chemical Abuse, my weekend, "False Idols."
"I chose DIRECT health assertive Christ Driven Behavior (CDB) instead of DISPLACED behavior in order to regain control over feeling helpless, powerless, trapped and lacking control. I changed my, "Thinking," and God changed my life."
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There is no reason why anyone with any hurt, habit, or hang up cannot be helped. The Person-God partnership simply needs to be more powerful than any hurt, habit or hangup.

Behind everything you do is a THOUGHT.

Every BEHAVIOR is motivated by a BELIEF.

Every ACTION is prompted by an ATTITUDE.

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With respect to behavior, life is about, emotions, beliefs, thinking and control.

"A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."Proverbs 29:11 (Displaced Behaviors)

"Do not be conformed by this world but instead by the renewing of your mind." Romans 12:2 (Direct Behavior)

When you think and empower yourself and surrender control to God, when you Intelligently Delegate Control to God (2 Corinthians 12:9-10),

God returns that control to you with a, “Helper," the Holy Spirit, (John 14:16) a form of Reciprocal Innervation.

You regain control: "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

No longer are you subject to corrupted displaced thinking but instead are transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2).

This is where science and scripture intertwine, where Christ Driven Behavior brings, values, control, cause, character and purpose driven behavior, the fruits of the spirit Galatians 5:22-23 .

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Proverbs 29:11 "A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."

Romans 12:2: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

2 Corinthians 12-9:“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”

John 14:16: "He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—"

Philippians 2:13: "for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

Galatians 5:22-23 "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Ephesians 4:22-23 "...put away the old person you used to be. Have nothing to do with your old sinful life. It was sinful because of being fooled into following bad desires. Let your minds and hearts be made new."

Life is about finding Purpose. When you have a, "Global Purpose," in life, healthy direct assertive thinking and behavior follow.

Change your thinking, change your life!

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