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10 Signs You're A Sex Addict

By Brian Whitney 02/10/15

Is sex starting to become a real problem for you? Take a look at our list for some warning signs you might want to look out for.

"So you like to have sex. Good for you. Sex is the best. But lately there have been some problems in your life because of your sexual habits. Maybe you really love your wife, but she dumped you after catching you having sex with the babysitter. "

Read more: http://www.thefix.com/content/10-signs-youre-sex-addict

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Addictions are just compulsions.  Some addictions even have the word “compulsive” in their names, like “compulsive gambling.” “Compulsions,” as a diagnostic group, are basically identical to addictions. They are behaviors that are strongly driven, repetitive, and difficult to stop even if you wish you could.

Lance Dodes, MD, Harvard Psychiatrist: "Addiction is all about seeking a remedy for overwhelming feelings of helplessness, and the exact form of an addiction, whether drinking or eating or watching online pornography, is no more than a focus for the addiction, not its cause. This is why people so often change the form of their addiction, moving from alcoholism to compulsive gambling to compulsive shopping, and on and on. Wouldn’t it be strange if people really were powerless over the focus of their addiction? When a person switched from alcoholism to compulsive gambling we’d have to say he was now powerless over something new. As the focus shifted there could be no end to the things he was powerless over – his powerlessness could spread like wildfire! (“I used to be powerless over just alcohol, but now peanut butter has me in its grip.”)"

The function (purpose) of addiction is to reverse a sense of helplessness. Addiction is a behavior intended to reverse a profound, intolerable sense of helplessness. This helplessness is always rooted in something deeply important to the individual. When circumstances in life make us feel helpless, trapped and out of control, some folks attempt to regain control of their circumstance with drugs. For some, sex temporarily removes the trapped feeling because the abuser is doing something about it, they are regaining control of their life with their misguided behavior.
All feelings are proceeded by thoughts. Hopefully, people realize that what is important in life is best, "Felt," when they rely on values, motivation and purpose and not on an ephemeral and artificial, Quick Fix or Mood Changer of sex, drugs or whatever the errant behavior.

 

Proverbs 29:11 "A fool vents their feelings, a wise person holds them back."
Romans 12:2 "Don't be conformed to this world but instead be transformed with new thinking."

All humans have hurts, habits and hangups whether they know it or not. All people are exposed to adverse circumstances and when that adversity is very important to us and we can't control it, we feel momentarily helpless.  We can escape the trap with healthy behavior or displaced behavior. Some escape with sex, other drugs, etc.  When you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, you replace the rewards (regaining control)  of displaced behaviors or addictions with the rewards of direct Christ Driven Behavior (CDB). When you give God control that control will be returned to you with the fruits of the spirit including self-control. We develop new values, motivation, purpose and character. Christ is a great motivational interviewer if you allow Him (James 4:8: "Draw close to God and He will draw close to you."). Through prayer and scripture we Recognize our emotional weakness, Reframe the pros and cons of our  behavior and Replace the cons with new Christ Driven Behavior.
 
Christ Driven Behavior empowers us to regain control of our lives by following the values and principles of the best Psychotherapist, Jesus Christ.  When we choose to, "Intelligently Delegate," control to Christ, this relationship brings motivation and purpose to our lives. This is the proscription for addiction and the prescription for the synergy of science and scripture.


__________________
"I am a Surrendered Believer in Jesus Christ with Free Will and I CHOSE Surrender (Intelligent Delegation) in my victory over, “Recreational Chemical Abuse, my weekend, "False Idols."
"I chose DIRECT health assertive Christ Driven Behavior (CDB) instead of DISPLACED behavior in order to regain control over feeling helpless, powerless, trapped and lacking control. I changed my, "Thinking," and God changed my life."
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There is no reason why anyone with any hurt, habit, or hang up cannot be helped. The Person-God partnership simply needs to be more powerful than any hurt, habit or hangup.

Behind everything you do is a THOUGHT.

Every BEHAVIOR is motivated by a BELIEF.

Every ACTION is prompted by an ATTITUDE.

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With respect to behavior, life is about, emotions, beliefs, thinking and control.

"A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."Proverbs 29:11 (Displaced Behaviors)

"Do not be conformed by this world but instead by the renewing of your mind." Romans 12:2 (Direct Behavior)

When you think and empower yourself and surrender control to God, when you Intelligently Delegate Control to God (2 Corinthians 12:9-10),

God returns that control to you with a, “Helper," the Holy Spirit, (John 14:16) a form of Reciprocal Innervation.

You regain control: "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.

No longer are you subject to corrupted displaced thinking but instead are transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2).

This is where science and scripture intertwine, where Christ Driven Behavior brings, values, control, cause, character and purpose driven behavior, the fruits of the spirit Galatians 5:22-23 .

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Proverbs 29:11 "A fool vents all his feelings, But a wise man holds them back."

Romans 12:2: Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

2 Corinthians 12-9:“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.”

John 14:16: "He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—"

Philippians 2:13: "for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure."

Galatians 5:22-23 "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.

Ephesians 4:22-23 "...put away the old person you used to be. Have nothing to do with your old sinful life. It was sinful because of being fooled into following bad desires. Let your minds and hearts be made new."

Life is about finding Purpose. When you have a, "Global Purpose," in life, healthy direct assertive thinking and behavior follow.

Change your thinking, change your life!

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